Showing posts with label baby names. Show all posts
Showing posts with label baby names. Show all posts

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

HEINOUS BABY-NAMING TRENDS TO CONTINUE IN 2008

Oh lord, no. The idiocy continues:
2008 is the year to break with tradition when it comes to baby names, says Suelain Moy, author of Names to Grow On. That means if you love Irish names -- but don't have an ounce of Celtic blood in you -- go with Aiden anyway. "Parents are also really starting to play around with language," says Moy, creating Nevaeh" from "Heaven" spelled backward or the funky "Semaj" from the traditional "James," for example. Miss your maiden name? Consider turning a surname, like Addison, Miller, or Carver, into a totally unique first or middle moniker for your kid.

Trend Tip: Road-test an offbeat name by using it to make restaurant reservations.

And here's my trend tip: road test offbeat names by writing them down on a piece of paper, then set that paper on fire and compost the ashes and never ponder a "unique" name again - because tens of thousands of other parents are making the same "unique" choices you are. This is how we got a generation of now-mortified ten-year-old girls named Britney. Still feeling good about that pick, moms?

After you've disposed of the trendy and shallow and the stripper names, go three generations back in your families and find out what names worked for them. If you're lucky enough to have a great-grandparent-to-be still alive, you'll both honor and delight them by using their name (or their spouse's). By way of example, the Noodle is named after her late great-grandmother, who died suddenly shortly before the Noodle was born. And to this day her great-grandfather keeps pictures of his two favorite girls by his bedside and gives them both a kiss before tucking in for the night.

Awww.

Monday, January 28, 2008

THE STRIPPEROSITY, IT IS STRONG IN GEORGIA

There's an endlessly-entertaining (and occasionally sad) searchable list of the state's baby-name database at the Atlanta Journal-Constitution:

There are 147 Georgia girls named Chanel, 31 named Cinnamon, 1,435 named Diamond

Gentlemen, now on the main stage, c'mon and put your hands together for the lovely...

And if your daughter's name sounds like it would fit nicely at the end of that previous sentence, get yourself down to the courthouse and pick out a nice Mildred or Ethel for her.

The thing that freaked me out the most about the list is that somebody in Georgia used the name Britney...for their son.

UPDATE: Poking around in that list sure is addicting. Here's what I found in the Georgia database.

1401 Jakes, 2 Elwoods.
17 Caesars, 18 Ceasars. (2 Neros.) (0 Caligulas.)
14 Ethels, 60 Mildreds, 99 Elmers, 93 Gladyses, 0 Hortenses.
87 Lesters. 230 Maddoxes (210 boys and 20 girls).
1 Adolf. 1 Stalin. 1 Saddam.
2 Toyotas, 24 Fords, 50 Chevys (40 boys, 10 girls), 0 Chryslers, 0 Hondas.
1 Samwise, no Frodos.