SO MUCH FOR BRINGING THE KIDS TO THE GAME

They got booked for a thingy with Mémère and Pépère on Saturday, so it's me catching up with some old college friends down at Shea for the Mets and my beloved last-place Reds, and doing Mother's Day with the Nana and Her Awesomeness on Sunday. There was an outside chance the kids were going to come along to the game, but then Her Awesomeness had to go and see this, from that Mets game in LA the other day:



And now she's nervous about next month's Yankees-Reds tilt at the Stadium, because my seats are right on the railing over the right-field corner. She's concerned that Abreu might not have the range to catch a kid if one of them goes over.

Since they're building Citi Field in the Shea parking lot, I'm taking trains to the game - and that'll give me a chance to report back to you on what the house wine is for Metro North. $5.50 a cup now, that much I know.

THE SNIFFLE SHUFFLE

Thought the week was sussed out pretty well. Home with the kids on Monday since their school was closed for Passover, so I shoved all the yard/house/office work into Wednesday, my second and final usual open day for the week. Weather's great, so as long as nobody gets sick we should be --

(cough cough cough...mommy? daddy?)

Aw, heck.

If you guessed that one of the kids up and got sick on Tuesday afternoon, shooting my finely-honed plans all to heck, congratulations! Have a cookie. You must be a parent, too! Okay, plan B. Play-Doh, drawing, lunch, nap. Are there any day games on so I can at least introduce Beast to the wonders of televised baseball? Nope, not a single one. Thanks a bunch, Lords of Baseball. Thanks for going the extra mile to help me bond with my boy. Way to introduce new fans to the game. Morons.

When I'm elected benevolent dictator, I shall decree there be at least one day baseball game for each day of the season so that daddies and their sniffly baby boys can recuperate the proper way.

THE COOLEST THING I'VE SEEN ALL YEAR

The people at Improv Everywhere are stone cold geniuses. CHECK. OUT. THIS. LINK.

(I'd post the video, but I'm having trouble making the video play nice with Blogger.)
(UPDATE: Made it work!)

THE KIDS' FIRST BALLGAME(S)

When the Noodle and the Beast came into our lives, I was hoping to be able to show them the wonders of Yankee Stadium and of...well, the 7 train on the way to Shea, at least. Was hoping to wait just a leeeetle bit longer though, but up go those two spiffy new ballparks, and what's more my beloved Reds are coming to both Queens and the Bronx this year, so there's no better time than the present to indoctrinate brainwash let them experience a big-league game for the first time.

Trouble is, the amenities for kids at the two old ballyards have never been much, and having seen that baseball palace in Philadelphia I'm thinking we're doomed if the game turns out not to be to their liking.

Would LOVE any tips on keeping a four-year-old girl and a two-year-old boy occupied at the game.

In the meantime, it's seven hours and counting toward the deadline for the Johan Santana trade to go through. Tick...tick...tick...don't you panic now, Mets fans. Really, just stay relaxed. Deep breaths.

1921-2008

John McHale, the first president of the late great Montreal Expos, has died at age 86. Funeral services will be interrupted by a pallbearers' strike, and will then resume in Puerto Rico when none of the Canadian mourners show up.

Kidding aside, I really do miss the Expos, and McHale was a big reason for their thriving in Montreal. And they did thrive, kids. Until that damnable strike. I regret never having made it to Stade Olympique for a game until '99, although the then-future Her Awesomeness and I did get walk-up seventh-row seats behind the plate.

I can't get behind the Expos' incarnation in DC; after all, Montreal in August is much more pleasant than DC in August...or July, or June, or September, or pretty much any month that doesn't have cherry blossoms in it.